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Jokes

Tongue Twisters

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Joke Time

Why did the orange stop?

Because it ran out of juice!
 
 
Why did the tomato blush?
 
Because it saw the salad dressing!

 

 

(e-mailed by Aoife G.from Third Class)

 

What is the best way to talk to a monster?

from a long way off!

 

Why do mice need oiling?

because they squeak!

 

Who delivers Christmas presents to baby sharks at Christmas?

Santa Jaws !

 

How do you get a baby astronaut to go to sleep?

You rock it!

Where do sheep go to get a haircut?

To the Baa-bers!

 

Why did the cow cross the road?

Cos he wanted to go to the mooooooovies!

e-mailed by C.B.F.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the disco?

He had nobody to go with!=) sent by e-mail

 

Why was the Math's Book upset?

Because it had many problems.

 

Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

Cos he wanted cold ,hard cash.

 

Why did the bee get married?

Cos she found her honey.

 

What do you get if you cross Spongebob with Albert Einstein?

Spongebob Smartypants.

 

What do you call a bear with no shoes?

Barefoot.

What does a snow monster use to build his house?

'Iglue '

 

What's a lion's favourite game?

The Preystation.

Thanks to Carling for the above jokes.

What happens when you throw a green stone into the Red Sea?

It gets wet -ha ha ha from Alannah

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Why couldn't Jack cross the road?

'Cos he was waiting for the chicken to go by.

received by e-mail from Aisling . Thanks Aisling.

Why do elephants have grey trunks?

Because they're all on the same swimming team!!!

e-mailed by Caitlin .Thanks Caitlin.

Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you it might spread!

 

What do you call a girl standing between two houses?

A lane !!!

 

Why couldn't Robin play basketball?

He couldn't find his batman!!

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What did the pink panther say when he stepped on the ant?

Dead ant,dead ant,dead ant,dead ant,dead ant.

 

 

What is a snakes favourite subject?

Hisssss-tory from AC

Knock,Knock who's there?

Phyllis. Phyllis who?

Fill us a glass of water!

 

Why did the boy cross the playground?

He wanted to get to the other slide!

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'why the long face'

 

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh.

 

What fish can't swim?

A dead one.

Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the moovies

 

What are two things you cannot have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner!

 

Why did the girl sprinkle sugar on her pillow before

she went to sleep?

So she could have sweet dreams! ]

 

Knock, Knock!

Who's there!

Banana! Banana who?

Banana split!

 

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What do sharks eat ?

Fish and ships !!!

 

What happened to the dog that got cooked?

He became a hot dog!!

 

A pig has three kids.

Pop,Nop, and what is the other childs name?

What!!

 

Knock, Knock!

Who's there?

Goat!

Goat who?

Goat to the door and find out!

 

What do you call a donkey with three legs?

A wonkey!

 

 

Why did the jellybaby want to go  to school??
       because he wanted to become a smartie.
 
e- mailed by Aoife and Niamh

 

What happened to the cannibal who was late for dinner?                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        He got the cold shoulder!!!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      e -mailed   by Ghaliah

 

 


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Tongue Twister Time

BETTY BOUGHT A BIT OF BUTTER

BUT THE BIT OF BUTTER BETTY BOUGHT WAS BITTER
SO BETTY BOUGHT A BETTER BIT OF BUTTER

e-mailed by Amy

Said one gumboil to another gumboil how much oil could a gumboil boil if a gumboil could boil oil

e-mailed by Ghaliah

 

She sells sea shells on the sea shore!!!

e-mailed by Caitlin and Aisling

 

 

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